You told me every word on your mind, no filters–
And nothing that I needed to hear
You filled silence with your incessant need for attention–
And nothing that asked about my life
You made countless promises, filled my heart with hopes and dreams–
And nothing that took action in five years of waiting
You called and claimed you changed, threw a bone at my wants and interests–
And nothing that reflected them as your own in your voice or character
You left me second guessing my best decisions–
And nothing but a wound so close I’m left…
I phone a friend and find life–
He binds my wounds and gives me hope again
but his heart
is closed to mine.
I think of all the love I shared with you, and I realize it wasn’t nothing–
but it ended in nothing.
I’m tempted to pick up the phone and try again–
then I read about the eight years we tried and failed and know…
there is not enough life left to repeat it.
For all the love we shared that was real, I wish you well–
May you find a heart that gives you rest and welcome; May her love for you be warm and ready
May you give her the best of you–healed and whole because that’s all a new love deserves
not the ghost of regrets with mine.